


Sex Cartwheels

by meh_guh



Category: Marvel
Genre: M/M, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-07
Updated: 2015-02-07
Packaged: 2018-03-10 22:06:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3305081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meh_guh/pseuds/meh_guh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A challenge and some voyeurism.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sex Cartwheels

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Spacedog](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spacedog/gifts).



> For the always-delightful softpunkbucky, because of Bazzy Stan's insistence on torturing us with shit like a movie with motherfucking _sexcartwheels_.
> 
> For fuck's sake, Bazzy, why you gotta be like this? T_T
> 
> Originally posted on Tumblr somewhere, only minor edits done since.

'I'm not so sure this is a good idea,' Bruce says, but he doesn't opt out of following the rest of the tower's current occupants down three levels into the most heavily-reinforced training room. It's probably, he reflects, a good thing most of the team is off doing other things right now. This particular terrible idea could only be exponentially more disastrous if Clint or Natasha were here to egg things on.

'Hush up, Minty Fresh,' Tony says, offering him a bag of dehydrated mangosteen. Tony's taken to obsessively (what other way? Tony Stark doesn't do casual outside the bedroom, and since Pepper not even there) chasing down anything he thinks might make Bruce smile. The effort itself is what makes Bruce happy, but exotic fruits in a New York winter don't hurt Bruce's mood.

'...you _can't_ do it,' Steve insists, grinning like a kid as he helps Bucky off with his jacket. 'I don't care how limber you are now, the Bucky Barnes I know _cannot_ do twelve cartwheels in a row.'

Bucky gives Steve his standard dead-eyed look, with nuance number three: teasing Captain America. 'I once infiltrated the Olympic Gymnastic team to eliminate a CIA mole.'

'Rea-ally?' Tony says, shoving the mangosteen into Bruce's willing hands and stepping forward to bounce on his heels in front of two supersoldiers who each outclass him by six inches and at least fifty pounds. 'Which year?'

Bucky goes blank in the way that means he can't answer a question he thinks he ought to, and he strips his t-shirt off too.

Tony and Steve exchange one of those antagonistic, hate-sex eye-fucking gazes they're so fond of, then Tony returns to Bruce's side. Bruce offers the mangosteen, but Tony's laser-locked on Steve and Bucky stripping in preparation for their cartwheel-off. Not, if Bruce is honest with himself, a life choice he can find fault with.

'You know,' Bruce says; not upset, just contemplative. 'I was once a respected researcher at a prestigious college.'

'You're _welcome_ ,' Tony says on autopilot. Bruce considers pointing out to him that ogling his team mates is probably in breach of some section of the bro code, but Pepper has Tony's leash well enough in hand without anyone else's interference.

'I'm so glad you dosed me with twelve hundred rads of gamma radiation, Tony,' Bruce grins. 'You're a real pal.'

Bucky and Steve move to the edge of the training mat, and Bruce and Tony both lean forward.

'Try not to get too sore,' Bucky grins; an unfamiliar expression on his usually-dour face, then he's whipping backwards into a one-armed backflip that turns into a dizzying series of cartwheels and flips on alternating arms and finishes in a freewheeling twisty flip Bruce has no name for.

'Right,' Steve shakes his shoulders out and pitches forward in his own line of flips.

'Not sure i can judge properly,' Tony calls when Steve's own final double somersault is over. 'Try it without the pants, boys.'

Bucky's hands go to his waist, but Steve slaps a hand out to stop him. 'Do _not _encourage the man, Buck. Tony, I know JARVIS is down here too.'__

Tony sighs, dramatic like only he can be. 'Babycakes? The boys would like a judgement about who's more limber.'

'Indeed,' JARVIS says, something close to a laugh in his tone. 'By cross-referencing with seventeen hundred recorded gymnastic performances, I have devised an algorithm to measure performance based on twenty-three criteria-'

'Nutshell it, Peaches,' Tony steals the last piece of mangosteen from Bruce's hand. 'Who won?'

JARVIS remains silent for a moment. 'Actually, sir, though they performed differently on each criterion, they achieved near-identical scores overall.'

'Ha!' Bucky pokes his human index finger into Steve's sternum. '"Knockoff serum" my perky butt! Score one for the Soviet gymnast!'

Steve responds by grabbing for Bucky like they're ten years old and wrestling in front of someone's mother-

'Huh,' Tony says when Steve's managed to pull out of the porn star kiss. 'Probably shoulda seen that coming.'

Bruce nods, then his eyebrows shoot right up as Bucky shoves both his metal _and_ flesh hands down the back of Steve's pants and rolls the to the mat.

'Maybe we should leave?' Bruce says, but he can't bring himself to put much conviction behind the suggestion with four hundred-odd pounds of supersoldier beefcake writhing sweatily in front of him.

'Probably, yeah,' Tony says.

Neither Steve or Bucky make any noise about being left alone, so Bruce and Tony stay where they are as two sets of pants and one set of underpants ('Steve, you _slut_ ,' Tony says delightedly) fly off.

Bruce is just starting to shift a little, wondering what the protocol is for adjusting a hard-on caused by two friends in front of a third when JARVIS clears his non-existent throat through a speaker directly behind Tony.

'Sir,' he says as Tony and Bruce watch Steve and Bucky try to climb inside each other.

'Shut _up_ , J,' Tony hisses. 'And you had better be recording this!'

'It's Ms Potts, sir,' JARVIS says. 'She asked where you were and is on her way down.'

Tony's eyes bug out, and Bruce can _see_ the options flicking through his mind; he can see the regretful moment when he settles on "be good boyfriend and pretend like this never ever happened".

'Right,' Tony grabs Bruce by the elbow and drags the two of them over to the door. 'Well, looks like the show's over, anyway. Let's go find some science to do!'

Bruce glances back at Steve and Bucky.

They're kissing now; a slow, intense moment that looks more like revving up for round two than a cool-down to him.

'Yeah,' Bruce snakes a hand down to adjust himself and hurries Tony out the door before Pepper can see what's going on. 'I think they're done.'


End file.
